Monday, June 2, 2008

The Singular Emotion

Am I angry? Am I happy? Am I sad? Am I depressed?

I envy those people who can define their emotions in a single word. So simple. So black and white. Just the simple ability to say, "Yes, I am angry."

It's never that simple for me. I look at what looks like a seemingly simple situation and see it all in five dimensions. All of the viewpoints, all of the uncertainties about my understanding of the viewpoints. All of the misunderstandings. All of the emotional issues allowing others not to see the situation clearly, and uncertainty about my own issues that may not allow me to see a situation clearly.

Just painting my emotions with the single color of, say, "angry" does not even begin to cover the full complexity of it. Too many other variables involved.

It is partially for this reason that I've been a strong proponent of the saying, "With Complete Understanding comes Forgiveness." It has been my experience that the more I understand someone the more that the reasons for their behavior the more that their behavior, be it "good" or "bad", becomes understandable...indeed, inevitable.

Do I paint with too broad a brush or too narrow a one? Am I too much a person who forgives first and asks questions later?

I'm too tired right now. "Anger" is definitely one of the emotions I'm feeling right now. Anger comes with several dozen other feelings. It's never by itself. Nothing in my life would ever be so simple.

Exhaustion is another feeling I'm having. I need a good nap. I cut out of work really so that I could get some rest. Don't want to spoil it.

Love you all

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

hmmmm... well, at least it's good to know that I am not the only one who is often unable to properly define to someone how I feel...

...and some very good points you made, but for many it is not possible to see all angles of things.

Alphonsus said...

That's part of what's so frustrating, Mykyl. I can't see all the angles, but I do KNOW that all the angles are there. Just one more big, fat uncertainty.

malakyte said...

Hmm i know that i am somewhat like that also at times, though i think i am getting better at defining my emotions.

I do try to be slow to judge usually unless i am taking things personally.

Everyone is justified in their own eyes.

FD Spark said...

There has been times I really want to feel a certain way or just didn't understand the situation completely and things got very difficult for me.
It was a whole lot going on all at once and end result was just nothing but exhaustion.
I hope things are doing well in your life whatever you're doing or going through.
I am glad to see you writing again a lot of people missed you posting in your blog, including me.