Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Pain

So much pain throughout the world. Emotional pain. Physical pain.

So much pain in my friends. So much pain in those whom I love the most.

I know the pain encompassed in my own loved ones…in my own circle of friends, and I try to imagine all the other pain that must be out there. Pain even worse than what these people suffer. What would the pain of 6 billion people look like if piled into one place. Could even the mythical Hell be worse than what is suffered by some in our earthly paradise?

I want so much to heal the world; to take all this pain and make it vanish for people. I want to have the strength to be able to take everyone’s burdens and place them on my own shoulders. I can’t bear to watch another suffer while I stand idly by.

Yet, I know that I haven’t the strength. I can’t even bear my own emotional pain. I can’t carry another’s physical pain—I can’t hardly tolerate going to the dentist to get my teeth clean.

If I was given the chance—the gift—to take all the worlds pain unto me, so that the world would free of it finally, I’m certain that I would do it. I would die from unbearable agony moments afterward, but in the moment before that happened I would be happy, knowing that I was doing the right thing.

Alas, I do not expect such a gift to be given to me. So I must suffer as I watch others suffer. Helpless. With folded hands. Knowing that whatever comfort I can offer will be at best, fleeting. I haven’t a cure for anyone, and for some there are not even words that I can say that would ease the suffering even a little.

I want to heal the world. I can’t even heal myself.

Aianna, you have my blessings and prayers today, for whatever they are worth. The same goes for my loved ones who are in pain. I don’t know what to offer other than kind words and support…

These are not enough to affect much, but even if they are completely useless, they remain all I have to offer

Love and blessings, all Please keep the pain at bay as much as possible. I may not be able to help you, but please know that I desperately want too..

7 comments:

Wren said...

It is a terrible thing to see another person suffer pain, especially those we love. As a parent I know this all to well. When my children suffer I know I would give anything to take it away.
And pain which lingers, on and on, with no hope of relief is something I would gladly lift from others shoulders if I could.
But to take away ALL the pain of the world would do us all a disservice I feel.
Many things which cause us pain can also bring with them gifts. Childbirth can cause immense pain, and yet I would gladly suffer that pain for the gift it gave me. Some sorts of physical pain can help us to feel great achievement. How many athletes would say 'no pain, no gain'. The pain itself throws the achievement into greater relief, making it all the more special. If the pain was gone, and the process was easy, would we feel the same about what we had done?
Many cultures include pain in their rituals, enabling the sufferer to reach a higher state, one beyond the pain.
Emotional pain can also heal. If we felt no pain when a loved one died, would we care about their life as much? would we be able to let go and carry on. Sometimes we need to walk through the fire to reach the other side. There is a song I like which talks of death and 'memories that bless and burn'.
I feel that pain can bless us, as well as burn .

Wren said...

Since leaving this comment, I have been thinking. As always I am too analytical. I wanted to say also, that your post deeply moved me. To see that you care so much about others and the world. I do not mean to belittle that feeling.
As you show in many of your posts, the world is full of love and laughter also. Hugs, Wren

Anonymous said...

As you have helped me to understand - we can only do so much. You know well that I have the same desire to heal, and that I often reach too far trying to do so - but sometimes it works. Sometimes I am able to give comfort, sometimes I am able to ease pain. No - I can't fix everything, but if I let myself get too bogged down in worrying about that I can't do anything.
But if everybody took this tactic - to help who they could when they could, the entire world would be a much better place.

I know how much you desire to fix everything, but if you just do the little that you can when you can, you WILL make the world a better place - and you already have for me several times. :)

malakyte said...

You are a very compassionate person Alphonsus and i dearly care for you as a friend because of that. But as others have pointed out here, sometimes pain has a valuable purpose.

Wren has said it beautifully.

But for someone like yourself it is not necessarily a good thing to suffer too much for others. The pain is there and there is nothing that can be done about it, except to communicate that you truly share the pain at the moment of communication.

In that you really can help the other person bear the burden. If you truly communicate that.. not with words but with your being you can relieve the other person of their pain somewhat.. at least temporarily, and in that make a great difference in anothers life.

But beyond that do not beat yourself up or spend too much time pondering the pain of others. You do have your own life to live and there will always be pain just as there will always be joy.

Anonymous said...

If you don't mind me putting a personal religious view here... I think Alphonsus that you have summed up more succinctly than a hundred sermons, the heart and compassion of Christ. But I actually wanted to share a short poem/story that I shared with Wren a while ago, as I think it speaks better than I can...

"Once a man was walking along a beach. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful day. Off in the distance he could see a boy going back and forth between the surf's edge and and the beach. Back and forth this boy went. As the man approached he could see that there were hundreds of starfish stranded on the sand as the result of the natural action of the tide.
The man was struck by the the apparent futility of the task. There were far too many starfish. Many of them were sure to perish. As he approached the boy continued the task of picking up starfish one by one and throwing them into the sea.

As he came up to the boy he said, "You must be crazy. There are thousands of miles of beach covered with starfish. You can't possibly make a difference." The boy looked at the man. He then stooped down and pick up one more starfish and threw it back into the ocean. He turned back to the man and said, "It sure made a difference to that one!"

Camilla said...

"It sure made a difference to that one!"

Benjamin, what a wonderful way of looking at things. Instead of beating ourselves up over what we cannot do, think about the difference a single action can make for a single person. You have irrevocably changed their life (hopefully for the better!) by your action.

I am going to try very hard to hold onto this story, and this concept. It is exactly what I have needed to hear.

And regarding religion - Alphonsus has always welcomed discussions of religion. It is a topic he is fascinated by. As long as it remains a philosophical discussion and no flaming takes place (and in a religious discussion you can get some pretty awe-inspiring flames by summoning the underworld!)

Princess Ivory

FD Spark said...

I know what pain is I often have wished their was magical way to cure it all. You're very caring to want to take it away.
I have often wonder why pain exist.
Some believes say the pain is there for reason. In one buddhist tradition it compares suffering and problems as mud water, yet for lotus blossom to grow it requires muddy water.
Sometimes it just doesn't seem fair
and whatever one might read about
why we suffer just doesn't excuse
the fact that someone is suffering and unhappy.
Yet it would be inhumane to not want to do something. Sometimes
we can't do anything for various reasons.
In my reality or in past their has been major pain and cruelty. Children become abandon, neglected and abused because their other things to do.
Sometimes there really is nothing another person can do, except be kind, and wave lamp of hope in the darkness.